Lately I have felt exhausted. Like all of the energy has been drained from my body. I want to lay in bed and watch movies all day and not talk to a single soul. That is how I feel. I also feel guilty that this is how I feel.
I want to be motivated. I want to be on the go, using this down time to crush it and accomplish a ton of things. I am annoyed that i have all the time in the world and yet I feel like I should be spending it doing things that i don’t even want to do. The more I try to do them, the more tired I feel.
Maybe this has happened to you. Maybe you understand the frustration of being exhausted and feeling guilty for being exhausted. You’re not alone.
I am learning that when my body says slow down, it really does mean slow down NOT “push harder.” Slowing down and resting is not lazy. I feel guilty about this often because I feel lazy, when really I am just not allowing stress to push me past my limits, which is super uncomfortable to me. I am used to pushing myself.
I feel weak that my body needs to slow down. When I am not accomplishing things I feel useless. For some reason my brain connects accomplishments to being worthy.
I am learning how to defuse the lies in my heart. I am worthy right now, exactly how I am. I am in bed, writing this, in sweats and a sweatshirt with coffee. I do not have to be at my best to be worthy, and neither do you.
Sometimes we really do need to slow down and listen to what the small still voice is saying to us. Sometimes we need to stop setting alarms and let ourselves sleep, or nap during the day. Sometimes we need to make a list of one or two things we want to get done that day and be proud of ourselves for accomplishing those things, even if they are small.
You don’t need to move mountains to be worthy, you just need to be. Exactly who you are in this very moment is worthy, and there is nothing you can do to change that.
Listen to your heart. It will tell you what it needs. There is no shame in doing what is best for your body, mind and soul. This season will come to an end and you will need something else. But right now if you are tired and exhausted– SLOW DOWN. Rest. Take a bath. Read a book. Watch a crappy movie. Take a nap.
Whatever you are feeling right now is okay. Whatever your heart needs right now is okay. It is not weak to slow down, but actually very courageous.
From someone who loves to be on the go,
From someone who feels guilt when she needs rest,
From someone who is learning her worth is unconditional,
From someone like you,